Journey through space to the Planet Fabulous, where the Ruler of the Universe will see you shortly.

Thursday, December 11, 2003

Family Matters

My dear sister is staying with me for a two-day sojourn. Bless her, she's not the brightest bulb in the box, nor is she the most reliable. I was meant to be in town last night, supping a glorious pint of crème de filthe with the lovely Jayson, and mon soeur was supposed to be joining us. A conversation between she and I:

"Meet me in town. You won't have your car, will you?"
"Nonono, I'll come on the train. Don't worry!"

Hours pass.

"Lee! It's Nick. I'm at Earls Court!"
"Whatever for?"
"I'm trying to find the road to Peckham!"
(slow, dawning horror)
"You're in the car, aren't you?"
"Yeah! I'll be at your house in about thirty minutes!"
"But! But! I'm at Oxford Circus and I'll have to get home and... oh, there's no point, is there? You're not even listening. Sigh. I'll be there in around forty five minutes."
"Half an hour? See you then!"
"No, forty- you've hung up, haven't you? You silly bitch."

So you can imagine my horror when she slammed down her wine glass last night and proclaimed she was 'dead interested!' in learning about space. She sat there coming up with all the usual questions like "wow.. so space goes on forever? Yeah, but what's after that?" like she was going to be Stephen Hawkin's next lab assistant.

Talking science with my sister is akin to force-feeding a sheep caviar. But Lovely Housemate Iain hunkered down, prepared a speech about superstrings and 12-dimentional physics and launched into her little world that normally just contains information on the best hair conditioner and scrunchies to use. I left them to it and went to do some work.

I'm not sure exactly what happened between the two, but I did pass Iain on the way to the bathroom later. I've never seen someone so ashen faced and glassy eyed.

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