Journey through space to the Planet Fabulous, where the Ruler of the Universe will see you shortly.

Tuesday, July 06, 2004

Art is Life

Last night I went to a fabulous gallery collection opening, in which my annoyingly talented sister was being exhibited. Bless her, she's not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree, but she has this maddening ability just to do things. Like shrugging, saying she's going to university and studying photography. Three years later, her pictures are up in a London gallery. Hmph.

Well, never one to be outdone, I made sure that I mimicked exactly what one should do at a London gallery opening a la the best and informative programme on TV, Alias.

So I went in a wig.

And I pretended to look for something by Rambaldi.

I was thrown out after ten minutes, unfortunately, and so I skulked off home, Rachel Stevens' new one on my Porn-Walkman. Now, as per the video, the incompetent bewigged leader of the girlie gang is quite capable of stepping along in time to the throbbing beats. I tried, and I fell over. Readers, she must have the tiniest of legs. Whenever she walks in real life, she must be accompanied by the 'tinkle-tinkle-tinkle' noise from the top end of the piano - just like when Jerry is running away from Tom.

She could be being worked from the back, of course.

Speaking of which, I'm very much missing my dear Wife today.

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