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Wednesday, September 29, 2004

The Terrible Price of Fame

Larks! Over breakfast this very morning, I saw that Dannii Minogue has released another single. Oh, we really must get that lock seen to... Anyway. The video sees our Second Favourite Aussie Popstrell(tm) in a whole host of bizarre situations! Here are the events as they happen. You can gladly gasp along, as we did!

* She comes in with a gorgeous boy-thing! And kisses him goodnight!
* She strips off her unflattering blue Can-Can dress, and starts cavorting around her oddly small flat!
* She runs herself a bath!
* She and her four flatmates (where do they all sleep?) dance around the apartment in weirdly choreographed dance routines!
* (Actually, we approve of the last point, as it's how we spent most of our Friday nights)
* She cavorts around in her pants with her imaginary hunk! (Note that she never kisses on the lips. A point to be raised later...)
* She charges herself on cocktails!
* Her flatmates install her in her unflattering blue Can-Can dress!
* She's off into the night with the gorgeous boy-thing!

Now. As you can see, this poses a whole world of problems.

Firstly, does the narrative suggest that Dame Dannii is a prostitute, a lowly whore completely at the whim of her horrid flatmates? Note that she comes in, dressed in a frock that is so covered in spangle that it has started rucking up at the front, and refuses to kiss the gentleman caller on the mouth? Then she's whisked around the flat by her minxish pimps, given a healthy rohyphol cocktail, and forced out into the night with yet another gentleman caller before she's even been able to take advantage of a lovely Radox bath? Meaning that this punter is going to be 'stirring the porridge' for the rest of the night?

Or. Has Dannii done something to anger The Time Lords of TV's Doctor Who, meaning that they have put her in a time-loop? Is she forever destined to travel the same 3 minutes 30 of mediocre pop history again and again and again for some hideous crime that transgresses the Three Laws of Time laid down by TV's Rassilon? The most logical one that comes to mind is that she's knicked a TARDIS and turned it into a bland apartment - as it's the only explanation how she and her trio of friends could possibly fit in it, you know.

Lets face it, number one is more likely than number two. Not because the Time Lords don't exist, but because it's a very good explanation how she's got a new record contract. So we must break her free of this drudgery! I myself shall be trawling phone boxes of Ol' London Town for her card and break into her tiny flat armed with mace to subdue her pimpy housemates! Who's with me?! Together we can rescue a b-list celeb! Raaaa!

7 comments:

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nope said...

Hi,

I'm sorry for being intrusive in to your blog. But I am Melissa and I am a mother of two that is just trying to get out of an incredible financial debt. See my hubby is away in Iraq trying to protect this great country that we live in, and I am at home with our two kids telling bill collectors please be patiant. When my husband returns from war we will beable to catch up on our payments. We have already had are 2001 Ford repossessed from the bank, and are now down to a 83 buick that is rusted from front to back and the heater don't work, and tire tax is due in November.

I'm not asking for your pitty because we got our ownselfs into this mess but we would love you and thank you in our prayers if you would just keep this link on your blog for others to view.

God Bless You.

Melissa K. W.
To see my family view this page. My Family


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Beach Raceway said...

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answer-man said...

**handbag**

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