Journey through space to the Planet Fabulous, where the Ruler of the Universe will see you shortly.

Wednesday, October 20, 2004

Design 101: Colour

Handy Tips for You Fabulous Things!

Picture the scene: you're kicking back in your office, eating donuts and looking through eBay, wondering whether you should bid for a fabulous antique fish-kettle, when your boss comes in. What? Oh yes, you're allowed to change the details - the type of donut, what you're wearing - but not the fish-kettle. Anyway, he says that you have to do a movie poster! In under ten minutes!

As this is always happening to me, allow me to ease the process. First off, you're already limited in your pallet, as years of conditioning tell us what we're about to see. Witness -

White: Romantic Comedy (cf. Bridget Jones, Wimbledon)
Pink: Peppy teenage comedy (cf. Mean Girls, 13 Going on 30)
Black: Space! Anything with yer sci-fi elements, unless it's sci-fi comedy, where it has to be Yellow.
Blue: Psychological horror. Usually has smashed glass on it too.
Orange: Denzil Washington has pretty much cornered orange, oddly.

And never the twain shall meet. Oh, but it has! Imagine my horror when I saw the poster for Aliens Vs Predator - the white monstrosity assaults the eye! See?

What nonsense

But, as you can see from the above list, comedies have cornered the market on white backgrounds. Or more specifically, the romantic comedies that spew forth from our own tiny movie industry every year. The gosh-darn thing looks like a romantic comedy, with the Alien leaning in to whisper acidic nothings in it's tin-hatted comrade's ears! Should the tag-line not be 'Whoever Wins, We Lose... The Fashion Show!'

Although, hilariously, it is possible to then cross-breed said scary film with some white-backgrounded comedies. Observe the new Bridget Jones...

'Skulls cleaned today: 6. V. Bad'

...and the far more interesting About A Boy!

I do hope you've all learned your lesson. Class dismissed.

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