Journey through space to the Planet Fabulous, where the Ruler of the Universe will see you shortly.

Wednesday, December 22, 2004

A Marvellous Series of Events

Oh, t'is the party season! Why, it doesn't seem there's a day gone by in the last week when I haven't crawled into work, last night's crumpled party frock stinking of smoke and rucking up around the knees, my make-up sliding down my face. Here's some highlights:

Something Old!
The best wedding ever on Friday night - so marvellously laid back. When we arrived there was no catering at all - which was a little odd, particularly as I could have eaten the arse out of a low-flying duck by that point - so I settled to line my stomach with a couple of filling vodkas. A couple of hours passed, when we were all a couple of sheets to the wind and the girls were doing that special drunken dance move where they think they're sexy and slide down your body, the kitchen door burst open and three enormous platters of bacon sandwiches where wheeled out.

I was so happy I almost started crying.


Something New!
The Charming Jay and I had a housewarming party a couple of days back, and we were presented with a plethora of gifts in order to gain access through our fabulous portal. These ranged from flapjacks, to phallic fridge magnets, to a paper shredder - which I'm totally besotted with. I am utterly delighting in its destructive nature, and have been feeding it with everything that comes through the letterbox. Hopefully in the misguided notion that it may get fatter, and therefore bigger, and therefore be able to start eating Jehovah?s Witnesses.

Later this evening I am going to introduce Jay to it. With a little bit of luck, when he?s a couple of gins down and wearing a tie.


Something Bottled!
Every now and again I forget why I like my high-flying-meeja-job. For one, we had a team lunch yesterday that we decided to go on until we'd finished. Seemingly not just the food, but the whole bar.

That's the first time I've come back to the office so drunk and so late that all I could do was get my coat and go home.


Something Blue!
I have an invite to a porn actor's birthday do this week. When I normally get introduced to someone I've heard of I say, "Love your work!" and I have to ask, is it uncouth in this situation?

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