Journey through space to the Planet Fabulous, where the Ruler of the Universe will see you shortly.

Thursday, March 31, 2005

Lost In Translation

You haven't got me today - I've gone home 'ill' thanks to a rather unpleasant hangover. So today's entry will be done by my understudy. He's OK - can't do the high-kicks, and the low notes of the final number seem to elude him completely, but you should get a decent show before your sit-down dinner for five.

Anyway. The reason behind this drunken stupor was charity, of course - a fabulous Hat Party in aid of the Tsunami appeal (a second choice after my suggestion of a pool party went down like a cup of cold sick). And we managed to raise £5000 in one night - mostly at the bar, so you can see why my sweat is now flammable. And let me state for the record, I was by no means the worst one there, leading to that midnight the drunken camaraderie between workmates that always turns inwards in a 'I really, really like you' way. And I seem to get the brunt of this - it appears a Gentleman Who Can't Catch is always a safe conversational bet with the ladies in the Typing Pool. I don't mind at all - it's all rather flattering, really. And in an uncharacteristic moment of self-importance (!) I do have to say I did look fabulous last night.

Well. I'll make no bones about it, I carry a hat well. Some people just can't do hats - Ken Bigley for one - but it turns out my bizarre-shaped head can sport millinery no trouble. So I was wearing my Aussie rancher's hat with some pride, and causing some raised eyebrows from the office girlies. Bless 'em. And spearheading this appreciation was one charming girl - you'll know the kind, the type who has furry tops on the end of her pens and spends meetings doodling little unicorns in the corners of her memos. "Oh Lee, if only you weren't gay..." she said, one foot slipping slightly under her. Sweet girl, we spent the next ten minutes talking about cock sizes for a laugh before I got passed around to the next lot of ladies. I tell you - all the straight gentlemen reading this blog (I know you're there, I can smell the Lynx deodorant) if you ever want to cavort outrageously with the girls, you just have to pretend you've been riding on the Other Bus for years.

Interesting thing, though. There's a married gentleman I've worked with for ages who I've always had a bit of a girlie crush on. Such a sweet man. Anyway, as I packed up my battered hat to leave, he came over and held me at arms length, clasping on tightly to my shoulders and fixing me with such an intense stare. Then he said something that was obviously really important about us two, leant in close and kissed me on the cheek.

But the music was too loud, and I never heard what he said.

Interesting. Interesting and odd.
 

16 comments:

mainja said...

of course it was about hats... ;)

Neil said...

why is the word 'all' floating floating by the title of yesterday's entry?

c'lam said...

how exciting.

will you be planning some other event with quieter music so that you can get to the bottom of it?

Owen Blacker said...

Quieter music sounds like a fabulous idea. Has there been any further information to be got from the receptionist-cum-guardian-of-the-stationery-cupboard since?

(And I so have to tell you about my weekend... ;o)

cash at home said...

Hello, you have a great blog here! I'm definitely going to bookmark you!
I have a network marketing lead site. It pretty much covers network marketing lead related stuff. Check it out if you get time :-)

DigitalCamera said...

Hey, great blog! Keep it up.

I have a minibike site. It pretty much covers minibike related stuff.

Come and have a look if you get time :-)

Den said...

Hi, I was just surfing around and found your page!
Very cool,I didn't know you could find all this interesting stuff.
If you are interested, go see my gas powered scooter related site.
It isnt anything special but you might still find something of interest.

Mike said...

Hi, Nice blog you have here. Lots of great info on charger diego san tribune. I have a charger diego san tribune related site. It has lots of information, discussion, stats etc. on charger diego san tribune. Please check it out if you get a chance.

Hoodia said...

Help me Dude, I think I'm lost..... I was searching for Elvis and somehow ended up in your blog, but you know I'm sure I saw him in a car lot yesterday, which is really strange because the last time I saw him was in the supermarket. No honest really, he was right there in front of me, next to the steaks singing "Love me Tender". He said to me (his lip was only slightly curled) "Boy, you need to get yourself a San Diego cosmetic surgery doctor ,to fit into those blue suede shoes of yours. But Elvis said in the Ghetto nobody can afford a San Diego plastic surgery doctor. Dude I'm All Shook Up said Elvis. I think I'll have me another cheeseburger. Then I'm gonna go round and see Michael Jackson and we're gonna watch a waaaay cool make-over show featuring some Tijuana dentists on the TV in the back of my Hummer. And then he just walked out of the supermarket singing. . . "You give me love and consolation,
You give me strength to carry on " Strange day or what? :-)

GS said...

Hey here is a site that actually gives away FREE tickets to Las Vegas shows. They have other useful information regarding Las Vegas getaways and blue man group tickets Check it out blue man group tickets

Roberto Iza said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
James Baker said...

Hi Friend! You have a great blog over here!
Please accept my compliments and wishes for your happiness and success!
If you have a moment, please take a look at my site:
verbatim dvd r
It covers verbatim dvd r related subjects.
Have a great day!

Joe Berenguer said...

Hi Friend! You have a great blog over here!
Please accept my compliments and wishes for your happiness and success!
If you have a moment, please take a look at my site:
video and dvd sales
It covers video and dvd sales related subjects.
Have a great day!

Paul Adams said...

Hey Fellow, you have a great blog here! I have a web
site & blog about verbatim dvd rw.
Yours is top-notch!
If you have a moment, please visit my site
verbatim dvd rw
I wish you all the best!

KphmQzTh said...

Hey I love this blog
do you want to trade links with mine?

answer-man said...

ps I'm having a little trouble sending comments so if I do it twice please excuse me and I apologize.