Journey through space to the Planet Fabulous, where the Ruler of the Universe will see you shortly.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

Fun With The Queen Part II

Here's something you can all make and do!

Take an ordinary UK bank note. Any one will do, but better do it quick before Liz carks it and we're stuck with Charles' ugly mug on all our beer tokens! Here's one I prepared earlier. Or more correctly, kicked a tramp in the goolies for.

Her Madge

Now, here's a handy guide to what we're going to be doing. Note the Lines A, B and C. Ooh, it's just like an Ikea booklet!

Fab!

Fold along Line A, like so. The trick is to make sure that the line of the fold goes along the corner of HRH Liz's mouth, right through her eye. Gruesome, but necessary.

Mutilate!

Now, Line B. Move to the other eye, very much in the manner of the Yorkshire Ripper! Fold that backwards too.

Genuine pub fun!

Now the hard part, as they'd say on Blue Peter. Pinch the creases of A and B together, pushing down and creating Line C between them.

The hard part!

Flatten out your note a little, and you should see the following! Look! The Queen is smiling at you, and you alone! She, as a benevolent being, is grinning down on all you, the little people, for giving her lots of your moneys so she can wear nice hats abroad.

Grin! Grin like your heritage depends on it!

But! If you tilt your flimsy currency downwards - lo! Her beatific smile vanishes! Perhaps that horsey Camilla woman has been spotted in the driveway again? Or Margaret has run over another corgi? No! No, your majesty! Don't fret so!

She will terminate you now

Quickly, you fool! Tilt the note the other way! Ah, that's better! The Queen will smile at you once again, and all is well with the realm. Huzzah!

Happy Queen!

There. Who said we weren't educational here?

18 comments:

klee said...

And there was I thinking for a moment that you were going to roll the note up.

Then you could have shown us the kind of fun certain Tory politicians DON'T have with the Queen.

St. Dickeybird said...

If only the real royals showed that much emotion!

Broadband Ian said...

Now, see, if you'd been around doing this some time back you could have showed everyone how Frankie Howerd was on the back of the £5 note.

CyberPete said...

I have to say that HRH Liz has a big mouth doesn't she?

Dantallion said...

Seeing such a smokey Mona Lisa smile on HRH is, well, really rather disturbing actually.

Adam said...

I work with many Italians at my job and I do this for them all the time with US 5 Dollar Bills. They love it so much that when I pass them in the hall they beg me (in an Italian accent) to "Makea da Lincolna laugh!!"

Katie said...

My uncle used to do this for me every christmas - he'd fold a note like that and put it in the front of the box of a chocolate orange, so it worked when you held the box and tilted it. Sort of a 3-in-one present: chocolate, tenner, and mocking royalty.

Snooze said...

Oh dear. Love the photo shoot, but am stuck with the image of Charles on all our currency.

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Finlay said...

i've just realised you can do it with charles darwin on the back of this note too! (i haven't really noticed him properly before, oddly) it's actually quite funny to make him smile as he looks quite grumpy normally.

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