Journey through space to the Planet Fabulous, where the Ruler of the Universe will see you shortly.

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Christmas Comes Early!

Apologies for not being around yesterday - we spent most of the day rolling around the floor, laughing our cocks off in glee after we'd accidentally caught a glimpse of the new Girls Aloud Special Edition album cover. Look upon it! Look upon its fantabulous garishness, and wonder why we love them so much!

T'is Better to Give Than Receive!

Well, all bar the ginger one, naturally. Despite being packed up with what appears to be three bottles bottle of Caffeine-Sodium-Benzoate in this shot, Nicola still retains the dead-eyed stare of one of those robots from Battlestar Galactica.

Doesn't it look festive? And I'm sure at least one or two readers can see a jolly nice bird on there who deserves a good stuffing... What a marvellous Christmas chez The Aloud it would be! Can you imagine, them getting a little tipsy... maybe a little lesbionic as the night wears on? Just messing around...


INT NIGHT: Girls Aloud Kitchen

Cheryl: Wahey!! Wooo!!

Nadine: Oh Cheryl!! Mind the brandy butter!!

Sarah: Oh, Kimberley!! More!! More!!!

FX: Giggles, slapping noises. General fun.

DOOR OPENS

Cylon eye noise.

Silence.
 

13 comments:

Kellycat said...

And their smiles are so sincere...

I imagine Christmas dinner actually being held in stony silence, only interrupted by Uncle Louis, who's got a bit misty-eyed after too much babycham and keeps trying to put his arm round Nadine, while trying to convince her that she's like a daughter to him.

Evening ends with Nicola being left to do the washing up on her own, Cheryl stealing the other's Christmas presents and Uncle Louis crying.

tornwordo said...

Wait, those are real human beings? Cylon eye noise - hilarious.

Broadband Ian said...

Dear Lee

Your fictional sketch of the Girls Aloud Christmas works for me on so many levels. Am now off to Costcutters to get some brandy butter, just in case their car breaks down in the local vicinity on the 24th December.

But I wonder if I should get some presents too, just in case? Any suggestions? Obviously, as I lived in fear for a year of Declan coming over I've already got a bell, book and candle I can give to Nicola.

Lee said...

> Wait, those are real human beings?

Apparently.

Dantallion said...

It all looks very 'Desperate Housewives', doesn't it?

Lee said...

Good lord, you're right!

Kellycat said...

I was thinking more Stepford Wives.

Wonder how many things Kimberley can do with a pine cone?

surly girl said...

i'm shit scared of nicola. at least with la tweedy you stand a chance of getting a good punch back and flooring her when she attacks you in the bogs at cheekies in croydon of a friday night. if you got in a fight with nicola her arms would turn into guns and she would cut you in half in a hail of bullets, all the while reciting the chorus of "the show" in a jerky, metallic voice.

blimey, i've scared myself now.

EarthMother said...

Good God, I share a gender (and a species) with these beings? How utterly frightening.

morgalou said...

Eeeek!

They say a picture's worth a thousand words.... and I can think of a choice few right now. I'm just too much of a lady to type them.

Lee said...

I love you, Surly Girl.

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Bwah hah hah ha! Ahah, hah hah hah ha! Hah ahah ahah aha ha...

It was all I could do do keep a straight face while perusing this at "work".

Surely poor Nicola's already (les)bionic what with being a Cylon and all?

You do make me laugh!

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Yes I did say "poor" Nicola. Does that make me a bad person?