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Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Honey to the Bee

Bees are seasonal creatures, most notable for their yellow-and-black markings, distinctive buzz and hive system.

When provoked they will sting, piercing the skin of their injured party with a specially-designed tip that extrudes from the rear of the body, the other end of which is attached to the lower contents of the bee's abdomen. Due to an interesting development in the sting's design, the end of the tip is hooked and will latch on to the skin of their injured party. As the bee withdraws, it leaves with it the sting, as well as a good portion of its internal organs.

So this results in their guts being ripped out. They will then do an exhausted little dance before slowly dying.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is exactly how it must feel to spend £200 on tickets for Madonna's new tour.

Postscript
Actually, I've been thinking about this a bit more. Bees are rather too similar to we Gentlemen Who Can't Catch when you get down to the nuts and bolts. Well, they too love bright flowers, sport gaudy colours and worship our queens. Oh, and often communicate by dancing.

14 comments:

Qenny said...

You mean we're all going to die before we get to see her?

*gasp*

mainja said...

nice.

tornwordo said...

Buy extra and scalp darling. (If you can even get them when they go on sale.)

CyberPete said...

Highway robbery dear! Highway robbery! But she will do Horsens (Denmark) and that's only 35 km from here, hmmmmm

Jemima said...

When I was a lass bees were supposed to die after stinging you, causing pain, sorrow and swelling, and having their guts ripped out. Turns out this is not usually the case. Am I the only person disappointed by this?

Nice metaphor incidentally.

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

First Nations said...

yeah yeah yeah.
so are you going?

Gaymosexual said...

I prefer the analogy of a Thai Masseur. You pay an extortionate amount to have a wrinkled old hag cause you pain for an hour or so and then you leave wondering why you bothered, and weren't her arms just a little TOO muscular and mannish?

Miss Cellania said...

Yowsa, thats about, uh, I don't know but a LOT in US dollars. I might feel the same way. But no, I wouldn't have paid it.

St. Dickeybird said...

You didn't!

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Snooze said...

Excellent description of those who bought tickets to see Madge.

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