Journey through space to the Planet Fabulous, where the Ruler of the Universe will see you shortly.

Monday, October 01, 2007

The Power Behind The Throne

Hello, Glitterettes. I believe I have come to be known as the Boy on here, and so I shall refer to myself as such.

Lee has asked me to take over from our delightful mystery guest and carry on blogging for him for a little while. Well, I say 'asked' but then it is quite impossible for a man who has seemingly fallen off the edge of the planet to ask you anything, isn't it.

Yes, dear Lee is MIA. (This does not mean Man At Argos as I thought for many years)

I last saw him a couple of weeks ago as we walked along Oxford Street shopping for pearls that we could clutch at key moments in conversations, and the next thing I know a stretch pulled up beside us and a slender, taloned arm stretched out and yanked him into the back seat. The weird thing is, I could see a red light moving back and forth in the darkness, accompanied by an unsettling 'fwoom, fwoom' noise. I'm sure I could make out five svelte figures in the murk of the back seat, but to guess at more than that would be pure conjecture on my part. I, as I'm sure all of you do, fear the worst.

Alas. Yet the show must go on. This blog has been our only source of income for a good six months now and I'll be damned if I don't keep it going so that I can carry on living in the style I have become accustomed to. Day after day of the most divine and extravagent meals lay out before me; mini kiev after mini kiev, glorious hosts of the most golden fish fingers and the most carefully constructed bowls of noodles, drizzled with sauce de tomate that you have ever seen in your lives.

And so until the return of my love machine, with whom I share a whole lotta history, I shall continue to write in the hope that he will read it wherever he may be and he will know that even though life got cold, he'll see the day when our sacred trust will bring him back home. He really is something kinda ooh.


Inexplicable DeVice said...

Well, how delightful to here from you, um... The Boy. Yes.

Am I led to believe that The Final Cylon, AKA Nicola from Girls Aloud has got her clutches into Glittering Lee?
What horrors will he be subjected to?

P.S. I have a lovely recipe for haricots sur la pain, flambe, should you require it.

Tim said...

Or is Lee the final Cylon? Duh-duh-duuuuh!

I do hope he doesn't wake up somewhere all disorientated and covered in goo.