Journey through space to the Planet Fabulous, where the Ruler of the Universe will see you shortly.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

A Fabulous Letter

Dear CERN or madam,

It is with interest I note that you may or may not be trying to destroy the Earth.

Well, we know we all feel like that some times - heaven knows we've been counting the days since the last 'Dancing With The Stars' finale - but sometimes you have to just 'buckle down and defog the tea-pot' as our grandmother would often say. Especially when they'd been using empty thermometers as a straw again.

And it all sounds very exciting, yes. Well, we thought it was meant to be very exciting, but then they put that nice Stephen Hawking on and he didn't seem very animated at all.

Frankly, if you wanted Hardon Colliders, I recommend Sailors Sauna in Limehouse, just around the time that EastEnders finished on a Sunday afternoon. It's rife in there. And will give you ample opportunity to explore the odd black hole or two.

Lots of love,

The Gays


Qenny said...

I'm not sure if the hardons at Sailors are large enough. These are sexually deprive science geeks we're talking here. If they're going to put together a hardon collider, it's got to be a really large one.

Oh, and yay - we're still here! The world hasn't ended.

Kezza said...

I've collided with a hardon or two in my time. The world didn't end then so I'm not sure what all the fuss is about really.

Lady Muck said...

Yeah I heard it was 30miles long or something. Now that's girth. I have emailed my telephone number to the nice people at Hardon Colliders in the hope that they tire before it does. Fingers crossed.